There was once a Lazy Consumerist without a care in the world. He enjoyed spending, splashing the cash and putting pictures on Facebook of his expensive holidays. One day, while hooning about in one of his heavily financed BMW’s, he noticed his busy cousin saving hard.
‘Silly cousin, you toil so hard when you could be enjoying yourself. Why save money when you could spend it on cars, clothes and holidays?’ said the Lazy Consumerist.
|Lazy, so lazy|
‘But my cousin, you will be cold and hungry in the winter that is retirement’, replied the concerned Industrious FI Seeker. He looked north, ‘And winter is coming.’
‘Retirement?’, laughed the Lazy Consumerist. ‘That’s years away you fool. I’ll have plenty of time for that. And remember, YOLO’. With a skip and a heel click, he swaggered towards his BMW.
So as time passed the Industrious FI Seeker saved hard, spent less on tat they didn’t need and paid off their mortgage. A beady eye on escaping the Horde, had he.
|Busy seeking Financial Independence|
As the first chill of early retirement appeared he retreated to the security of his well stocked financial nugget, and relaxed in front of a cozy fire thinking passive income thoughts.
Years passed pleasantly as the Industrious FI Seeker built up multiple income streams, owned a few rental properties, got his golf handicap down to 10, traveled 10 weeks a year, had a couple of small businesses, learnt to play the ukulele, mastered photography, finished Skyrim four times, did some serious side hustling and then there was a slow knock at the door.
There before him stood the pathetic sight of a shivering, miserably looking Lazy Consumerist. ‘Please give me a hand out, I’m cold and starving, the Hire Purchase company has repossessed my BMW, I can’t afford my mortgage, I lost my job and have no other skills and I have no real mates. Besides, it’s all the government’s fault for not telling me how to manage my money and letting companies lend to me’, begged the Lazy Consumerist.
The Industrious FI Seeker thought a while, sipped on his 18 year old single malt, and passed the Lazy Consumerist a business card. “www.thefinancezombie.com – Spend less, save more and escape the Horde”. He did a well practiced heel click and closed the door.